Allowing yourself a cheat meal here and there is manageable, but what happens when those cheat meals happen every day? Then maybe multiple times a day? Now you're at the point where you're not even motivated to workout. So you're basically eating poorly, not moving your body and BAM you've fallen off. We have all done it where we just care less. Life gets in the way and becomes way more intense then usual. You begin to feel tired all the time, sluggish, unmotivated, bloated, any of these sound familiar?
I have fallen off my game many times, and I'm not ashamed to admit it. I may find every excuse in the book as to why I have again, but at the end of the day I know the deal. It all starts and ends with me. No one is force feeding me or stopping me from exercising. I make all of my own decisions which is sometimes a blessing and a curse. This past "fall" we can call it, I fell hard. I stopped eating healthy altogether, along with my workouts. When I had enough of my pity party and was ready to put in the work I got clobbered with a cold that knocked me right back on my ass. Once I started to regain my strength and breathe out of my nose, I needed to make a new plan. I'm pretty sure everyone's New Year's resolutions is to lose weight and be healthy. But without a plan your goal is nothing more than just a wish. I refused to let this time around be like the others. It's easy to order in a pizza when you don't feel like cooking or snuggle up on the couch during these winter months instead of hitting the gym. But easy isn't so easy after awhile. After awhile you start to gain weight, you don't feel great and in the end you'll still have to put in the work to get rid of those extra lbs. So what was my plan? Well, as a certified personal trainer and nutrition specialist I obviously knew what to do. I had all the knowledge from my certifications and experience with my own trials and my clients. But I still needed to make a new plan. If an old one didn't work, why would I try it again? That is the definition of madness; doing the same thing again and expecting a different result. Our bodies change which means our regimens need to change with us. First I made a list of bad habits I had adopted to switch out for some new ones. Bad vs. Good No breakfast vs. Cooking breakfast at home Latte vs. Black coffee Buying lunch vs. Prepping lunch at home White pasta vs. Brown rice / Whole wheat pasta Crackers/Chips vs. Fruits/Vegetables Cheese/Mayo vs. Hummus Skipping meals vs. Green drinks Taco shells vs. Lettuce cups Taco/Burrito/Nachos vs. Make it a salad Margarita vs. Tequila w/ Soda & Lime Protein bars vs. Home made energy balls I had adopted other poor habits that had nothing to do with eating and everything to do with my mind, body and soul. Bad vs. Good Staying up late vs. 8 hours of sleep Messy bedroom vs. Cleaning and doing laundry Social media scrolling vs. Reading books Watching TV vs. Writing (My favorite hobby) Elevator vs. Taking the stairs Putting errands off vs. Allotting time each week for errands Small changes make a big difference. It's hard to quit everything cold turkey but small steps lead up to big goals. You have to start somewhere. This is how my clients and I start after a downfall: -Start prepping on Sunday -Start on Monday to intergrade your routine in with your work/daily life schedule -Buy a calendar to track your daily progress -Always have water and a healthy snack with you -Meal prep enough for the week so you don't miss a meal and binge on bad foods -Don't make dinner plans for at least two weeks; get yourself in a healthy routine before you interrupt it -Purchase a workout guide, hire a trainer, workout with a friend or get back into your previous workout routine -Keep healthy food in the house (try to get rid of all negative temptations) -Take pictures of yourself as a reminder to see how far you've come *Have fun with it! Becoming the healthiest version of yourself shouldn't be a chore. Your body deserves the absolute best nutrients you can give it.*
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Sure, we all know photoshop exists. It used to be one of those things you saw in magazines, before social media. You knew looking at the model on the front cover wasn't actually a waist size triple zero but you still drooled in aw of how amazing she looked. Fast forward to today's society photoshop is way more relevant. Something that you were used to just seeing in print ads or billboards is now literally everywhere you turn. Photoshop or simply fixing an image is now easier than ever. There are hundreds of apps that are free or a small price that can completely change the way you look within seconds. Scary right? Or maybe not. Some people love the fact that they have these tools at their finger tips. You see, social media has become that platform where you can be literally anyone you want. You can even become the most perfect version of yourself, with little to no cost. While I can't be the one to criticize because I have done it myself, like fix the dark spot under my eyes or make my teeth look a little whiter in photos, some have taken it to an all new level. Completely changing and editing the way their bodies look all for what? Followers? Likes? DM's? Is it really worth it? When we all know the moment you step outside your social media bubble you don't actually look that way? I thought long and hard about this post before actually writing it. I was hesitant because sure I use filters too and have done the minor editing also. So who am I to judge right? But have I changed the way my body looks to sell my fitness plans? No. Have I edited my before and after photos to sell more nutrition guides? No. I'm all about the term "fake it till you make it" but not when you're lying for an audience, or an income. I am just like any other typical 20-something year old girl. We are all impressionable and gullible to an extent. It's hard to see other people on social media whom you might look up to or compare yourself to, yet they don't even look like that. Our society is teaching us to fix all of our flaws, make ourselves look perfect and sell that image to anyone who will listen. Terrifying, right? I know I have a gorgeous body (not to sound cocky) and I love who I am. Are there things I want to change? Absolutely. Would I love it if I could have insanely ripped abs? Yes, the real question is who wouldn't? And for me, I know I will get there the right way, the healthy way. But that little voice comes creeping back in while I scroll through my Instagram feed. The little voice nagging at you instantly telling you that you don't workout hard enough or you don't eat clean enough or you don't drink enough water. "You're not enough". Which isn't true! Don't let the insecurities of others become your own. What I mean is, if someone is so drastically changing their own photos they must be struggling within themselves to think others would accept them just as they are. And you shouldn't adapt those feelings either. We are all made unique in our own way. Some people are as skinny as a pole and some have curves. If we all looked the same there would be no diversity, nothing interesting in this world. My point being- stop taking social media so seriously. Surround yourself with positive vibes. Follow people who speak the truth. Look at things that motivate you to do better, not to bring you down. In a world that is constantly telling us we aren't good enough and that there is a quick fix for all our flaws, say no. Say no and love yourself for who you are and who YOU strive to become. Not someone the world is telling you to be. Self love. Love yourself and love others. Love is what makes this world go round, not photoshop! XO A few years ago Eric Thomas was introduced to me by a good friend. His words and attitude on life spoke to me in a way that inspired me to be a better person. Fast forward a few years and the exact same video still gives me the same inspiration. And while the video itself may not be all that great, its not shot on some fancy stage or with a perfect filter his words are all you need to hear. I myself like many others, have struggled with the paycheck to paycheck lifestyle for quite a while. As a recent college graduate, I think most of us are in the same boat. While trying to start our careers and pay off our elephant sized college loans, we still want to go on vacations, move out, save up and so on. So as someone who is in this constant battle I did some research on how I could get myself out of this lifestyle that I don't really love.
A few things first. I totally get that sometimes your paycheck is what it is. For me, I make the same amount weekly, and at the moment there isn't much room for growth. But don't let that hold you back, because I certainly haven't There are plenty of ways to actually make some great side cash while still holding onto your full time gig. Tip #1: Do you like animals? I've found that there is a great need for dog walkers or pet sitters. I don't have a pet, but from friends and family who do they always discuss how difficult it is to have someone watch their pet when they're away. Look into networking with some folks and coming up with a price to watch their pets, instead of sending them a shelter for a week. Tip #2: Look in your closet. I have so many old clothes, bags and shoes I never wear and some that still even have the tags on them! Nothing like some fall cleaning to go through your closet, find what you don't want and sell it! There are places locally you can sell it to or sell it online on apps like Mercari or Poshmark. Tip #3: Be a driver. Now this is more of a part time job but it is something that you can do whenever you feel like it. With car services like Uber and Lift you can apply to qualify to be a driver. Check out their sites for qualifications, but if you have a few nights where you're not doing much and a car why not try it out! Tip #4: Save your change. This one may take a bit longer than others but I have to say it works. I have a huge change jar that I empty out my wallet into weekly. I don't typically carry cash to begin with, but when I do I save all my change. Before my recent vacation I rolled my coins and have $55 just sitting there in change! Tip #5: Start your own part time service. If you have a passion or talent that isn't your full time job, why not turn it into a side hobby that pays? For me, I started out personal training on the side for extra cash. If you're great at hair, make up, nails, nutrition, yoga, whatever it is- let it be known! Start a social media page and get the word out there. Tip #6: Babysit. If you don't love kids maybe skip over this one! But if you don't mind them let friends and family know you're around. It's an easy way to make some quick cash and hang out with kids. Plus if they go to sleep early all you're doing is hanging out on the couch like you'd do anyway at home! Tip #7: Coupons. Obviously there is some monthly payments you can't cut down on like food shopping, bills and gas. But you can try to make it a bit easier on yourself. For food shopping theres a plethora of coupons out there, so take a look online or take the stores circular and do your shopping based off some discounts. For gas you can find cheapest ones in your area with certain apps, or become a member where you get a percentage off for every time you fill up your tank. Tip #8: Cash back. For when you do shopping, one of my favorite websites is Ebates. You earn cash for shopping on regular sites. Depending on what site you shop on you get a certain amount back. My biggest paycheck was nearly $20 after doing online Christmas shopping. I know not a lot, but it did fill up my gas tank! Tip #9: Blog for someone. This one can get a bit more tricky. Usually with websites that pay for blogging you start off writing for free until your articles can gain traction. Or you have to first submit to see if you are accepted at all. But if you enjoy writing and it's a great pass time for you, why not do it and get paid for it, even if its not right away. Tip #10: Give your opinion. There are a bunch of different websites now that offer you money for giving your opinion. Take quizzes, watch videos, shop and tell them what you feel. The income varies from $1.00 to even $50.00 if you are selected for specific questionaries. Let me know what's worked for you! Comment below, what do you do to make some extra cash? Almost a year ago I was blessed with meeting a beautiful soul, who become one of my great friends. She is the kind of friend you need on your tough days and have the best times with on happy days. One evening when I wasn't myself she mentioned how she has a "happy list" on her phone. Her list consisted of things that made her happy when she was feeling down. At first I didn't find it to be much of anything, but when I was having my next bad day this list came in handy.
It's just a simple list of anything that makes you happy, that keeps your mind at ease and takes the crazy down a few notches. Happy List 1-Candles 2-Meditate 3-Take a shower 4-Go for a run 5-Watch my favorite tv show 6-Write 7-Take a yoga class 8-Go to the movies 9-Make yourself a meal 10-Call your best friend 11-Gather your girlfriends for a wine night 12-Go for a walk at the beach 13-Go for a drive 14-Watch a disney movie 15-Put on your favorite music 16-Put your phone down 17-Dance 18-Pamper yourself with a manicure 19-Get a massage 20-Take a bath It's Monday again. And if you're in New York it's even more of a struggle today as the clouds have rolled in and the rain washes the weekend away. Sipping your cup of joe getting ready for your day to begin, you have two options. Push through the week and let life happen to you, or make this an extraordinary week and allow you to happen to life. I am far from a morning person and if I neglect to lay my day out the night before it can go downhill pretty quick. I have found a few things I do every night, but especially on Sunday's to help me get my week going in the right direction.
1- Lay out your outfit for the week the night before 2- Prepare your breakfast, lunch and snacks for the day (or week) Sunday/night before 3- Lay out your gym clothes for the day 4- Drink a glass of water upon waking up 5- Have your cup of tea for a natural pick me up 6- Make your bed 7- Make a task list for the week 8- Plan one fun thing to do that week 9- Meditate 10- Send out a loving good morning text to a friend or family member I have gotten into the habit of doing at least 8 of the 10 on my list. Some tips sound funny to others but I'll give you my reasoning. Number 10 for example, send out a loving good morning message. It may sound silly but we live in a world of emotion. When we do something nice for someone else, their happiness makes us feel all warm and fuzzy inside. Plus it is never too early or too late to let someone know how much they mean to you. Life is short. Unless you wake up at 4am for work, maybe hold off on that text for a few hours! Plan something fun to do that week. I know I always operate better when I have something to look forward to, a goal as some would say. Now while getting cocktails with your friends may not be a goal it is nice to know that Thursday at 6pm you have plans and are excited to do something fun for you! I have never been huge on making my bed, in fact I usually just pull all my covers up and call it a day. And that is somewhat, what I mean by making your bed. There is some kind of accomplishment met when your room doesn't look like a complete disaster before you leave for school, and the same goes for when you come home. You can cross it off your task list. Which brings me to number 7. Us humans like to feel worthy of our time. Like we are a functioning member of society. Even if it is as small as picking up your roommates dry cleaning to paying off that big college loan- write it down. Make a check list and see what you can accomplish by Friday. Remember you have the same exact hours in the day as Beyonce. :) Meditation may not be something you're into or maybe even something you've tried. But I recommend it to everyone. As someone who suffers with a lot of anxiety and stress it is sometimes the only time of the day where I can completely shut my mind off and be at peace, even if its just for 10 minutes. If you have no idea where to begin, YouTube guided meditations or look at my previous posts on meditating! Father's Day for my family is usually filled with family and lots of food. Gathering with all my extended family is always a blast and some of my favorite memories. While family time is always fun the pressure of family questions arise the second I walk into my grandparent's house. It's usually the same three questions; "where are you working now" "what do you want to do with your life" and "when are you getting married". Three questions that somewhat terrify me and I hate to answer. Like please tell me I'm not the only one who gets harassed by relatives. It's like they think because we are all getting together that something new and super life changing has happened since the last family bbq. I wish!
As I sat at the table eating dessert with the fam, I listened for a while to the conversations. For many, many years it made me anxious knowing I was going to be asked what was going on with my life since I wasn't proud of anything. When I was in school I wanted to be done with it, once I graduated all I wanted was to go back. I never truly enjoyed any job I held since they all were part time gigs and could probably be done by a monkey. My confidence and belief in myself was low and I didn't want to have to talk about it with other people, even if it was my own family. As I sat and listened to the conversation about who's in new relationships or ended old ones, new jobs, new homes, and so on all I could think was how happy I was to be the position I am currently in. While I am not in love with the job I have it still pays the bills and allows me to work on my dream job on the side. While I don't love living home, I have a roof over my head with a refrigerator filled with food. While I would much rather be driving a range rover, I have a brand new leased car that always has a full tank of gas to get me to where ever I want to go. For so long I had been in a place of survival mode, feeling like the world was against me. Being questioned what I was doing with my life made me angry like people wanted to hear about me failing. The truth of it is though, it made me angry because I didn't honestly know and didn't want to look like a loser. BUT! I am in my 20's where most people have no idea what the hell is going on in their lives. I find some peace in the beauty of all this chaos. Yes I am not financially independent yet, but that is to come. It is so easy to get wrapped up and consumed in what we don't have because we simply don't have it. But what about getting wrapped up in what we do have. No, I don't have a high paying job and my own place like my cousin, but its not like I'm unemployed and living on the streets! It is truly all about perspective and how you perceive your own life. I was attracting so much negativity into my life because I was afraid. I lived with so much fear and hatred and anger because I was scared. Fear vs love. You can be terrified of any situation and think of all the ways it can go wrong, or you can love every situation and have faith that the best outcomes will be attracted into you life. Now when I talk to my family I am more eager to speak about what I'm planning. Maybe they wont understand, and that's okay too. But it doesn't matter if they do or don't because its my life. When I tell them I am writing my own blog along with my coaching and personal training, and hey I even started to write a book, everyone is more intrigued to hear about the good in my life vs the bad. We all have worked the jobs we don't enjoy or worked paycheck to paycheck and that is the same old story. Talk about positive and in return you will attract more positive in your life. Attention all girls and boys - men and women - all humans. If you haven't already heard of the book The Goddess Revolution by Mel Wells, well now you have. Let me tell you why this book will rock your world. I was looking for my newest read when I came across The Goddess Revolution. I thought nothing more then a good plane book for my trip to Disney world. I threw it in my carry on and that was it. When I couldn't get any shut eye on our flight I popped open this book to give it a go. The rest is literally history. Within the first 15 pages I had felt like coming across this book was nothing short of a miracle. It was like it was placed before me because it was exactly what I have been needing to hear.
To rewind a little bit, I have struggled with losing the last "10 lbs" like most people do. I tried every kind of diet, weight loss trick, pill, lotions, wraps and corsets yet I really couldn't get rid of my little muffin top. I had danced most of my life and then fell in love with working out, so I knew my physical fitness wasn't so much my problem. I knew I wasn't an avid dieter. I would eat "clean" one week and then the next have a cheat meal everyday. I knew of course, that this yo-yo diet lifestyle I was doing wasn't working but I couldn't truly figure out how to break the cycle. I thought if I paid for a program, paid to work with a nutritionist, meal prepped all the right foods and kept a log that I would be on point with my diet. The only problem was, I could have paid my entire life savings and still wouldn't see any results. Why? Because rules are meant to be broken. Okay, so maybe not all rules, like laws. BUT! Why give yourself rules to follow when it comes to nourishing your temple. I mean think about it, the way we talk to ourselves is very important. If you say I can't have that slice of pizza now suddenly it's all you can think about. But if you say I can have that slice of pizza, I just don't want it you don't crave it so much. Sounds like a mind game, right? It somewhat is. Picking up Mel's book became one of the best things that could have happened to mind and my body. If you have been battling with your self love, your "diet" regimen and your overall healthy lifestyle take a read and form your own opinion! The Goddess Revolution I have often come across this phrase "is love enough" in many different parts of my life. With romantic relationships, friends, family even material things. When you feel like someone or something has let you down in a way you may never be able to forgive this can often become a question in mind. For me I felt like saying "I love you" would heal all wounds. I felt that although shitty things may have happened to me that if I was told I was still loved that those issues would go away. Man was I wrong though. Yes in a bad situation it is needed to know you are still loved, from something as small as scraping your knee to finding out your marriage is over. Our world doesn't work without emotions. In times of distress we need to know there is more then just negativity surrounding us. That brings me back to my question, is love enough?
Is it? When you are betrayed by a loved one is the love between you enough to mend it? Maybe it isn't. Maybe the betrayal was so deep that it severed all chances to let love heal it. For me, my entire life my family surrounded me with love. Regardless of any situation my mother was always there as my safe haven to let me know I was in a loved place. As I grew up my view on life changed. I started to have romantic relationships and learned what it meant to love someone other than your family members. I learned what it was like to feel those butterflies in your stomach from another person and get all giddy when they walked into the room. But I also learned what it felt like the be hurt. I learned that not everyone is honest and pure. I learned that not all love is true meaningful love. As badly as I wanted to believe that love was truly like Disney fairytales it wasn't. I'm not sure if that was more heartbreaking than actually enduring the pain. Being where I am today, I look back on sometimes that I was hurt by others. I see where I was in that moment and who I was. I see how I would fight till the death and use love as my choice of weapon to keep a man around. Little did I realize that my love couldn't fix what he had done, or fix him at all. You see we all to a degree want to fix other people. One of my mother's famous one liners "you can't change anyone but yourself" and isn't that the damn truth. We all know it to be so, yet we all try to do it anyway. For me, I realized that if I loved someone to the fullest of my being that it would make him a better person. That my love would make him stop cheating or my love would make him want to spend more time together or that my love would fix his dark spots from his own struggles. WRONG! I knew I couldn't change anyone yet I was exhausting myself trying to. This thought recently popped into my mind when I had an issue with someone in my life that is not my romantic partner. I had been hurt and burned so many times, I genuinely thought is love enough? Is love enough to mend such a battered relationship? Is love enough when everything else is lacking? Do I have enough love to oversee all the shortcomings and lies and move forward with my life? My answer became clear as day though. After doing a bit of reading in my go to book Mastering Your Mean Girl I came to one startling realization. Love is enough. Love is enough to mend my soul. I didn't need to be bursting with love to fix my relationship with this person or to fix them. I needed to be bursting with love to help myself! Love is that emotion that you can never have too much of. Melissa (author of Mastering Your Mean Girl) talks about visualizing sending love to those who have hurt you. When I first attempted this exercise I thought I don't want to send them anything other then a good kick in the ass. But! I attempted it a few times to try to see where she was coming from. To my own surprise I had tears running down my face picturing myself sending love to someone who has caused me so much pain over the years. For me seeing through all the bad stuff and just for a moment sending pure love was my way of letting my pain go. Because truly thats what it's all about. Letting go of the bad and letting in the good. Back to my question of, is love enough? Love is enough. You are enough. |
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